Ned Priapus

Position: Continuity

Species: Scarecrow

Sex: Male

Birthplace: Costa Mesa, CA

Physical Description: About 5'10", maybe 20 lbs., Ned's made of different types of wood, all varnished a deep brown and well polished. His hat's made of cardboard, his head's a sack stuffed with straw and kept in that diamond shape by interior struts, and his hands are more like bushes than anything else.

Ned gave me a whole ream of stuff about himself that he wanted me to include in his Profile here. Amongst that stuff is his opinion, rendered at some length, that he's more qualified to write the material for our web page than I am.

Lemme quote you some: "As Head of Continuity for our branch of 'Hey, Your Nose is on Fire' Industries, I am in charge of all aspects of record keeping. Without me, we would never know what episode of the show was next, what we had played in the preceding weeks, or what we were scheduled to play in the upcoming weeks. Without me, our computer system would be badly out of date, our filing system would be completely archaic, our office would never be swept, and our desks would never be cleaned. Without me..."

I'll skip a little. "That all being said, who better to maintain such an important resource as our web page? Who better to keep its code up to HTML 2.0 standards? Who better to make sure its links are kept current? Who better to..."

You get the idea.

Carmen's final decision was that I should write the stuff since I'm the Air Personality and responsible for the actual public face of the Darkling Eclectica while Ned should then maintain the web page after I'd written everything.

Which is fine by both of us. Ned's really more interested in the mechanics of the thing anyway. He really does keep us running around here, and I know we couldn't do the show without him.

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